High Profile Meetings

I have been waiting to do this post for a while, simply because we had a bunch of meetings with various VIPS (Officiant, Venue, Bands) and I wanted to be able to tell the WHOLE story. So here it comes!

MEETING # 1: OFFICIANT

It was high time to meet with our officiant. We had actually been trying to plan a meeting since December, but things kept popping up. So finally we just made an appointment for last weekend. The morning of the meeting, Mr. Schnitzel and I sat Sunday-cozy on the couch and I hauled out all the papers that we had been given at our first officiant meeting, along with the song list I had been compiling since then. We literally hadn’t looked at any of this stuff yet (OOPS) but I was confident that we would sift through it. So we went through the ceremony schedule, dotted down our questions, and listened to lots and lots of music.

(ok, this is what really happened. I read the ceremony schedule and he paid attention for the first 15 minutes. Then he turned on the TV. I started to play potential music selections and babble on about when we could play this and that and wouldn’t it be romantic if we played this blah blah and starting getting the “uhhuh” and “mmhmm”. Fairly soon, I found myself alone with my laptop. Well, not REALLY alone, but Mr. Schnitzel had completely arrived in TV land and wasn’t coming back anytime soon. So I started to whine and he refocused and declared that we were NOT prepared for the meeting. I assured him that it would be worth it anyways, and he sulked. This really wasn’t a fight, just a bit of grumpiness on his part)


Right, so fast forward to Oliver’s arrival. He is a really nice man. Also a really LARGE man. He will loom importance in front of all our guests, let me tell you. Anyways, we invited him in and served coffee, etc. Our house was spic and span due to the rapid cleaning we had done 30 minutes before he arrived. Mr. Schnitzel actually suggested hiding the beer crates on the balcony, and I laughed. “cmon! he’s not even religious: he’s a philosopher! philosphers like beer!!!”. so we talked about the ceremony, the music, the processional, the speeches, the readings… etc etc. We talked about a LOT. Here’s some of what we decided:

we hope our ceremony will look something like this

 • The processional will be “traditional American” – now my job is to figure out what that means. We’re thinking: parents are brought in first, cept for my dad. Then, Best man and Groom enter front. Bridesmaids and Groomsmen in pairs down the aisle, VIPS last (MOHs). Flower girl prances in scattering petals. Then, cue bridey music, my dad walks me up the aisle. We meet at the front and turn to face everyone (this is a BIG thing for me – I want to FACE everyone!!! none of this german backs to you nonsense).

• Bridesmaids and Groomsmen will be standing around us, btw.

• Then, the welcome speech will begin (by Oliver), with parts in all three languages (polish, german, English) He will tell our story (there will be a translation in the program).

• Next, readings in Polish, German and English by friends and family. A total of 3 (one for each language) with interludes of guitar music by my dad (and with a little luck, fiddle music by my uncle!)

• Then comes the biggie! The speech, which we must “inspire” by choosing a quote that we like about love or marriage etc… This will also be translated in our program

• then come the vows. We will be saying them in BOTH languages (engl. and germany), alternating sentences. First a nice dedication statement, self written, to each other. then exchange of rings (rings will be carried by MOH & Best Man).

• Next comes the “symbolic” part.. some sort of ceremony (sand/tree/candle… we have to decide)

• TADA!! Married! Happy music, proceed back down the aisle with happy fanfare and something being tossed, shake a thousand hands and hug and be happy, walk up the hill to the prosecco toast!

WOOOHOOO
to be continued with: meeting # 2, THE VENUE (duh duh duh)

Dream Wedding

I'm sure many of you know the temptation to keep everything "realistic" in your wedding planning. But sometimes, it's fun to go outside the bounds of common sense and just imagine how you would do it if you could do it all. I took a walk on this lovely warm November day through Buchenberg and let my fanstasy run wild. This is what I came up with:

Ceremony on top of the Buchenberg, here: facing the Alps, perfect sunny weather with a light breeze... we hire some guys to carry chairs up to the top of the hill and set them all up. Mr. and Mrs. Schnitzel go up earlier to take photos and get a first glipse.

Then we hide behind the little chapel up there while the guests arrive. The guests will be brought be horse and carriage. Music played on the guitar by my father. After the ceremony, the guests will hike back down the hill.

...and will then be taken back to the hotel my horse and carriage with us riding on the front.

At the hotel - prosecco for all, and then a surprise visit from the Blashornspieler Buchenberg.

so.... the dangerous part of this kind of unhemmed dreaming is that I started to think that some of this might be doable. Maybe we can do the ceremony on top of the Buchenberg? why not? Maybe we can hire a few horse and carriages for an hour or two to shuttle our guests. So I started to email around... to be continued...

Ceremony - Inspiration Board

This is the first in my series of Inspiration Boards - I'd like to give you a little peek into my visions and sort out all my ideas along the way!  This one is for the ceremony itself, which will be taking place (hopefully!) outside down by the pond of our Venue. I'm thinking - pretty chairs, natural arch with flowers, mountains and hills in the background... (yes, those hills, so alive)...

What do you think? How did you gather inspiration for your ceremony?

Sources (clockwise from top left):
Style Me Pretty
Style Me Pretty
Project Wedding Blog
InStyle Weddings
Style Me Pretty
Polka Dot Bride

Musical thoughts

So I have been thinking a lot about music lately. It's been making me really excited, especially because I am a person who LOVES to be in a great atmosphere with lovely music. But really, don't we all? Luckily, Mr Schnitzel and I have very similar musical taste, so I think we should be able to agree on some wonderful songs that will complement our wedding. We have already decided that we will have a band for our reception, a cover band with an alpine vibe. Our venue gave us a list of about 20 bands that people book for weddings often, so it shouldn't be too hard to find something!

But recently, I have been thinking about the ceremony music, because it's something that I've never really thought about. I just started to click my way through online wedding classics, and then crept out of the box and into some of my favorite non wedding songs about love. I came up with a huge list of music we both adore! We still have no idea about which songs for the processional, recession etc, but then again, we do have 10 months to go! I did get this little thought in my head that I would adore it if my dad would play for at least a portion of the ceremony.

My dad is actually a law professor, but in his spare time he is part of a fabulous bluegrass band called Midlife Crisis. He plays the upright Bass and the guitar. I think I wouldn't make him schlep his Bass all the way across the ocean, but he just so happens to have a guitar hiding out in Vienna (long story – he plays songs for lawyers there every year for a moot court competition – for more details go here) or for a video, here. So I thought – wouldn't it be great if he played some tunes for us on his guitar at the ceremony? He has tentatively said yes – and then I started daydreaming about having my uncle (who I am not sure will make it. But if he does..) play with him on his fiddle. And then I recalled that my brother also plays the guitar! At any rate, I do hope there will be some family guitar music going on. I fell asleep so often to the strumming of my dad's guitar downstairs…

Meeting with Oliver

So! Some actual, concrete steps are happening. This weekend, we met with Oliver, our Officiant for the ceremony. He drove all the way from Nurnberg to our apartment on Sunday afternoon, and even though Mr. Schnitzel complained about this "silly stranger" barging into his lazy Sunday afternoon, I think he really ended up appreciating it.

We talked about lots of things: what we envision, what elements are traditionally included, possibilities for bi-lingual (or tri-lingual) elements, rituals, music, vows: the whole shebang. It was interesting, because I think Mr. Schnitzel was thinking "why do we need to meet with this guy at all? I mean? we have 10 months till the wedding, and really, what's in a ceremony? But after the meeting he was bubbling to me about all the decisions we have to make and all the possibilities and he also had some GREAT ideas. So there's a lesson to the ladies out there desperately trying to get the men involved: bring them to the meetings!

We have so many ideas now, and I am so happy that it seems like we are going to be able to realize our goal of having an American-style ceremony with other German and Polish elements. We also thought of some things to check out: location of the outdoor ceremony, available space in the indoor location, speakers, music? I am hoping that my dad will agree to play something during the ceremony on his guitar.

We want to do the welcome in all three languages, the vows in English and German, and include lots of bilingual material in the program. The speech will be translated at least into English. We also want to do as much as possible that speaks WITHOUT words ? beautiful music, special ritual, nice setting. We want to face our friends and family, and have our brides and groomsmen standing with us. If there's anything I've learned from years living abroad, it's that eye contact and facial expressions can tell so much, without words.

So basically: we're excited! Any suggestions from our there in the blogosphere? We are most especially looking for ritual ideas and ways to make our Multilanguage group feel included without giving everyone headsets and translating like in the UN. They should all be present, in the moment, even if they don't understand the words. Big task, I know.

Choosing the Big Wigs

We got a quote back from our preferred photographer and are strongly leaning towards taking her up on it. Kristen Speed is an American photographer living in Munich Germany. She shot my colleague's wedding and a got a strong recommendation from her, plus I like her style and the idea that she would be able to mix and mingle with the guests in ease. We are scouting out dates to do an engagement/couple shoot with her at the end of September, which should give us an even better idea of her style and give her a chance to get to know our personality as a couple. I'm very excited, and if you breeze her website you'll see that she seems to do a great job of capturing people, which is my biggest goal of the day.

The other "big wig" decision has been our officiant, because we would like to have a ceremony that is more festive than a German civil ceremony and we want to integrate some special, cross-cultural elements into the planning. Oliver looks like the perfect fit, especially considering that he just got back from doing a wedding in Tanzania at the foot of Mt. Kilimanjaro! Sounds like he is used to non-traditional ceremonies, and I can't wait to meet him and hear all his ideas.

I will be very happy to have these bigger decisions wrapped up early in the game because I know how fast good photographers and officiants book up – there are only so many Saturdays in the summer! I am hoping that this will free us up to make the little decisions with patience and also give me time to (ehem) write my Thesis! Just to think… a year from now I will be married and have my Masters!

In terms of planning…

There have been a few "advances" this week, most notably finding a photographer who I am interested in (still waiting for a price quote) and finding an officiant (aka free marrier) to do our non civil ceremony. They are tentative steps, but concrete ones, nonetheless. The next "big" planning step will be to meet with our venue next weekend to discuss big details, like potential meal plans, the possibility of doing the ceremony outside etc etc. I have to say, I am having a lot of fun.

Also, I toured a bunch of jewelers on my lunch break last week to scope out rings. I am not particularly enthused with the style of ring that is so popular at the moment in Germany, a sort of palladium grey plain thing with sharp edges… it's a bit too modern for me… and I am looking for something with a bit of embellishment to go with my beautiful sleek engagement ring . I found this pair that I like a lot:

I did find our great place with a guy who took the time to show me rings in all different metals in different cuts and weights. We decided that I will bring the boy back for a meeting together because, as the salesman claims "he can only make ring recommendations when he sees the couple in person". Just my brand of kooky :)

Another thing I would like to get done this week is to go to the Standesamt (civil marriage office) and find out what crazy forms and documents I will need to marry in Germany! I have heard rumors about a six month old-at-the-latest birth certificate (what's that about? I thought birth certificates were supposed to be…uh…from your birth!) so I am anxious to get started on that one.

Other "thoughts" that I have been letting float around are 1) décor/flowers (I have been saving an awful lots of photos, like this one ) 2) favor ideas and 3) possible ceremony configurations. All in all it's still "fuzzy" but that's the fun part.. scouting out all the ideas!!!

Celebratory Weekend (and setting the date!)

I spent this weekend with my parents, who were visiting us in Germany for three weeks (while my professor dad taught a seminar) and are leaving today! :( We had an amazing weekend though: we rode out to the Chiemsee (Lake Chiem) which is sometimes known as the "Bavarian Ocean". It is a beautiful lake framed by the Alps and chock full of q

uaintness. We stayed in an adorable hotel on a smaller lake, and spent satu

rday and sunday riding a ferry out to the "

women's island", browsing the shops, eating delicious food at all manner of island festivals, and just generally celebrating the occasion! My mom and I discussed colors and themes, of course, while the boys (dad and boy) raced up and down the waterslide at the lakeside pool complex trying to break the speed record as recorded by the automatic time system on the slide. So great :)

I am sad that my parents are leaving but I am excited about all the planning that is to come! My mom and I agreed that we would talk a lot on the phone and on Skype and that she would be consulted about every big decision, even if she is across an ocean. And we discussed the idea of me coming over in the spring to go dress shopping – I like that one! :)

We did already make one big decision though – we have set a date with our venue of choice! Oh right, we also picked a venue! But that was easy, because we knew we wanted to get married in Artur's hometown of Buchenberg im Allgäu, a small town in the Alps with a population of 4000 people – so there just aren't that many options. Fortunately, I have had my eye on a place ever since the thought occurred to me that I would love to marry this boy, and so as soon as he popped the question, we stopped by to take a look at the rooms! It's a lovely hotel/restaurant with a big event room complete with a stage and even a gallery balcony going around the outside. The catering is done in-house, which saves me the stress of finding a caterer, and there is no extra charge for renting the room, which is also great.Other perks include the tennis courts, mini-golf and duckpin bowling in the basement, and of course the guestrooms for all of my out of town guests! I really like the idea of everybody being able to stay in the same place – it will be a nice community atmosphere. And like so many things in German, the hotel is nice and beautiful without being too swanky or overpriced, so it should fit the bill for (hopefully) all my guests. They even offer guests of the wedding a cut price of 35 euro (including breakfast!) for the night on the evening of the wedding, so our friends coming from Munich can party into the late hours and still crash there without breaking the bank. So excited! We called and reserved our date, (sometime in early summer, psst), and are

ready to start to plan!

Our next big step will be to pick out a "Free Marrier" (for lack of a better translation) who can do our ceremony. Because we won't be marrying in a church (in German you must be a member of the church to marry in it, which neither of us are) and the only person with an actual power to marry people is the so called "marriage officiant" in each town, which is often the mayor. So the cool part is, we will probably be married by the Mayor of Buchenberg! Unfortunately, that ceremony is very much like a courthouse wedding in the US, all business and little romance, and also little room for other languages or traditions. So a possibility in Germany is to have a "free marrier" who does not actually have the power to marry you (which no one does in Germany except for the official people, not even the churches) but who basically does wedding ceremonies for people like us. We have found someone who we think we like, now we're just waiting to find out if the date is free!

Phew, well it turns out that we have done a lot! I have to get back to work, but I'll be keeping you updated!